Why? It isn't fair!

Why sadness doesn't pick or choose! 

Have you ever said 'why me'?
I know I have..many times!
It's a phrase that we learn right from when we were small children. 'Do your homework!' 'But why me, I don't want to'
'You are too sick to go to the party' 'Why me? That's not fair!'
Sound familiar?
What about as we get older. A friend betrays us, we get knocked back for that job, we fail an exam.
It hurts. We want to cry. We want to blame somebody, or something.

The problem is, asking why, doesn't ever seem to make it better.
Why? Because there is no right answer to this question.
Sometimes I feel like asking why is the story of my life. I've just, after many years, started to recover from my severe depression, then I end up in hospital for a few weeks with some physical issues. Then I get home, and as I heal, I get told a very horrible thing. My best friend has cancer, and it doesn't look good.
My first response.. 'WHY??' Why do I have to deal with losing my friend, on top of everything else. I don't need the grief!
It isn't fair! My friend is an amazing person, who has struggled and survived so much. She is an amazing friend and support to me and everyone she knows. She does NOT deserve this!
The problem is, the answer in my head to the question 'why me', is 'well, why not?' I hate it when my brain fights back!!Cancer doesn't pick and chose. It's not like only bad people get sick. If it's going to happen, it will, no matter who the person is or what the person does.
 I still don't believe my friend should have to endure this horrible illness, but I do believe that the sooner we stop questioning why, the sooner we can work through the hard task of acceptance, and finding ways to cope.
Nothing is going to make it fair, or right. Nothing can stop the hurt.
Yes, it isn't fair. Yes, there is no definitive answer to why.
All I can say is that sometimes, life hurts. It's not ok. Cry, yell, hurt, grieve. Don't feel bad for feeling these things. We all do.
And please know, you are not alone.

Sometimes life just isn't fair!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Is knowledge enough to help?

Friend in the fog

our pain leaves scars