Please listen

 Friday, 20 January 2018

Why can’t you understand???? 


Writing this blog is very difficult for me. I don’t like putting myself out there. I don’t like people seeing my weaknesses. 
But at the same time, I need to help people see. To understand what depression and anxiety is. 
I’m not really sure how to share myself more, my story. 
I want to reach out to people suffering, and to also speak to others, to show support and raise awareness of mental illness. 
At the moment, that’s hard.

  I am scared to say anything about myself. 
It makes me feel vulnerable. 
Insecure.
But that is also part of the illness I suffer from. 
My mind turns against me at every stop. Turning a simple word or action into something it’s not.
I worry that whoever I speak to or message will roll their eyes, or misunderstand something. 
I fear people are judging me. I worry that nobody actually really cares. 
Feeling misunderstood leads to immense loneliness. 
I’m going to share with you a memory of mine. 

 I was in hospital. I had been brought in to a&e after consuming about 20 seroquel tablets. 
I was trying to explain to the dr I was just feeling desperate..
The dr I was talking to, the one admitting me to hospital, patted me on the leg after I had explained how I felt. 
She looked directly at me and told me I was attention seeking..... that all I needed was to walk more with my husband daily and I would be fine
I want to clear that up. 
I’m no way am I seeking attention. If nothing else I try to avoid attention at all costs! 
I am not the only person who has had experiences like this. 
Many of us claim we know what’s going on, feel we can see deeper, when really we have no idea. 
For those supporting someone, don’t ever assume. Don’t butt in or claim to know the answers. Always try to be honest, and say how you feel, what you think. Those of us suffering need to hear you. Need to know you listen. 

 And to those struggling at the moment, don’t be afraid. Speak out. Say what you need to. People ARE listening and people care. 
It is important to realise nobody knows the answers and. Lien of us can be expected to understand. 

 This is a bit of a simple blog today, not much fancy language, no insightful picture.
But it’s the truth. 
 It’s real and honest.

So for those who know me, for those that read this blog, Please tell me what you think, I will listen, but first, make sure you are listening too. 
If you don’t understand, say so. Nobody can read another persons mind, feel another persons feelings. 

Thanks for listening guys. Xxx👂👀👂

You don’t have to speak to know somebody is listening 

Comments

Paul said…
Well said. Nobody can read a persons mind or feel another persons feelings. I think it is very brave for you to share your thoughts. There will always be 'haters' and doubters. Don't let them get in your way. Thank you.
19 January 2018 at 19:40
Unknown said…
It's always disappointing when 'professionals' have not learnt the skills to listen and try to understand what is being said to them in an open and non-judgmental way
19 January 2018 at 20:57
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